Things that also don’t mean anything bad

Just skip the first passage if it feels complicated :)(it does for me too), aside the first sentence.

It’s possible to say “I don’t think a lot of him.” and it being nothing bad so to speak. It’s not bad either way but what I mean is sometimes we feel it might be bad, or we actually just meant to say it in “the good” way and so it feels off when we say it in a disapproving-like way.

I mean it is quite a phenomenon. Because when you say it with its original meaning, then it feels good. And it’s almost as if saying it in a condescending way or whatever this notion is.. would lead to say it in such a way. Because it’s not said in the original way.

In German it means “to not hold a lot of someone”. So you don’t share a lot, which means it doesn’t even interest you. The actual sense of it. Like why would you be so involved with someone you don’t even think of a lot. So it seems the condescending touch actually has to do with not being able to say it in the real way. Being out of touch with that.

But I don’t mean any self fixing; that doesn’t exist.

How to deal with people who make one repeat things

When I say …, I mean …

It’s not offended, not argueing (I’m not saying how to say it, that would be absurd, I’m describing what I mean :). It might also be a boundary. It’s a bit playful, pure. It says the truth. It helps to not feel dumbed down. It’s something we naturally want to say in such spots.

I’d like to pay with my card…With the card?…When I say card I mean card…

(It went on like this: But I didn’t do anything (provokingly effectively) … But I’m just saying *relieved laugh*)

Some people do random things, pushing buttons, crossing boundaries, not knowing what they’re doing. I said it a little bit angrily or assertively and it caused the person to feel on the defence while at the same time she was provoking again. It also shows, that it’s okay to misunderstand someone, to not know why they were asking. It’s not a big deal. It’s nothing that couldn’t be resolved. Because it’s also such an innocent thing to say. I said it, she heard it, what’s there to ask? It’s a bit hilarious. And saying these simple things, these simple truths really help to be on the right page. Or in other words, it is how we feel, and it’s good to say how you feel.

Meaning of words: to refuse

It’s always good to get the image or the feel of what a word wants to say.

To refuse does not involve a lot of effort. If you would refuse something with overly effort then it would not be possible to do so. It doesn’t involve to convince someone.

In German the word for it is ablehnen. Ab meaning away and lehnen meaning to lean. Leaning off. Like a ball that bumps off of you. There is also something about angle in it.

In Russian it means отказаться. от meaning also off or away, just like ab in German. Kasatsja meaning to touch meaning “won’t touch this”.

Another image that comes to mind is to drop something in case one caught it.

Then, kasatsja means also to concern, which in German is betreffen. Treffen meaning to score lets say a bull’s eye or something or a goal actually too :), to not miss. But if you would refuse then you would be covering the whole goal and without your agreement, the ball does not go in, nor is there neccessarily any attempt to score, nor a goal at all.

So, betreffen means what it means concerning this or that, with regards to. There is interest in something, concern, attention to something or someone.

When refusing is expressed we say No. Or we say “I refuse” or actually “I reject”. Both reject and refuse mean ablehnen. So actually I am not really writing about refusing but rejecting or saying no because to refuse means rather to deny or withhold. Or Idk and it doesn’t matter because the images are there or the feel of it. What the actual word is, doesn’t really matter too much. Expressing these things can be very respectful because it is understood. It’s a bit like walking down the road and there is 2 people in the way but you know that they will make space.