Don’t take it personal

 

“Don’t take it personal”….” You wouldn’t say that if you didn’t mean it.” (it actually doesn’t mean, that the person meant it, but somebody who didn’t mean it, wouldn’t say such a thing)

This is btw the original thought behind my blog, 1 liners to express intuition/truth and assert things.

I was watching a Russian movie from the 70ies and somebody said with dignity, feeling slightly offended: “Don’t generalise it. pause Mine is an individual case.”, and they were friends, so he tries to reach him there. And I was imagening the other guy would reply : I didn’t mean to offend you, or don’t take it personal..and it felt really off to say these weird meta things.

I mean, apart from really meaning something like, I didn’t mean to offend you, apart from that, I feel it narrows life, like pushing pause. And then it appeared to me, that somebody who didn’t mean it personal would never say a thing like Don’t take it personal. I’m not saying there is an intention but you know…It’s really strange to say this stuff.

Overall I feel it’s a good idea to know what not to say and how not to say something. There was this other scene in a movie. Somebody was eating and the other person suggested to take some bread with it. He replied: Let me finish what I have first.

Sometimes we are focussed on how to say something which often comes with a ghostwritten thing about it, when it shud be about the expression, meaning no selfconsciousness. For some things we often have intonation habbits that communicate a tone that we might not even mean to communicate. So because of that, it would be good to know how not to say something, and the rest might just go by itself.

As for the above reply, in this specific situation the character says it non-asking, non-threatening, nonaggressive in general, nonpleasing and not trying to be assertive or lets say you could say that. And it was something I could relate to without meaning this in a repressive or definite sense. It simply comes from how you feel or how the the situation and said things are perceived, mostly it’s in the perception but it can be approached reverse by getting in touch with how not to say it.

But instead of that there might be fear of not saying it like that plus fear of saying it another way which causes not saying it the actual way. Very often there is fear underneath, and the question really is what the heck is the fear about and I think it is this.

The antidot for this, apart from meeting somebody who reminds one of who one is,  could be something like training in a calm moment or inspiration through life, also experiencing oneself expressing things with a different intonation, through imaginations that just come up, seeing how it feels (or acting, singing, ideally something natural, there isn’t really an intention, it’s something that’s enjoyable to do). But there is no goal to say it a certain way, that is actually just the point I’m trying to make. It’s an inspiration to connect back cause we always are already, everything is always there.

The moment you get in touch with the right intonation you give room for memories to come back to resolve situations from the past but only if there is real energy behind it or it would be impressive. Overall when things work they just work and there is not a lot of thinking. After all there is worlds between being and being self-conscious like a window that a bee tries to get through. It looks real but it feels different and once the bee found the gap, it just flies.

And we only try to say things a certain way because of this fear, or whatever it is , that causes to not say it the right way. It’s like a negative circle, like a layer.

Advertisements

Relationships

The good of something old is not at all not inclusive in the good of something new.

In another sense, it’s these 2 things, to either talk it out or create something new. It can be tricky to impossible when talking about it makes it worse. Somebody not wanting to talk about it,might easily feel unconsciously he or she simply can’t because of being lost or seeing it would lead to such, or fears and lack of trust also. Meaning to splitt is often actually because one wants to connect. And to create new requires a good amount of understanding. Somebody might say something but actually misexpressed it and then identified with it and actually doesn’t want to have a reply to it but feels so cause the feeling was pleasant. By that I mean the thing about says no means yes or the other way around.

It is not easy to create a proper relationship when both don’t have a a good sense for reality and self. Otherwise it can be like In Uncharted 2 the Coop, person gets stunned all the time. So the best idea seems to be to not be irritated so easily. Oftentimes, it always looks like it isn’t. Somebody might act like a worried parent, projecting fears but might actually be worried about being in such role maybe. So if you would say something like don’t worry, person would identify. It’s the theme of roleing and reroleing. So it would be better to just let the person be from knowing everything else makes it worse, it’s not really the same as in taking them for real and letting them be. Or saying something simply based on what one sees. It often needs the natural feelings/energy you feel cause we face energy also, so saying this is whatever as in achieving such, cause it’s automatic. It is more about knowing that it needs surely a real perception to feel and there is no point in trying cause when it is, trying is not part of that. Something not to do and knowing why because sometimes the trying is the only thing that might be distracting but not at all overall. Sorry for expressing this complicatedly 🙂

So in that sense you can’t try to create. Relationships go easy as children  and around the first quarter of life. Then “shit” of the world or not really the world sneaks in as in I’m angry about it, causes disconnections and it doesn’t matter to think about such and why and that it might make sense or maybe that it is unneccssary. It doesn’t matter cause one might aswell or prefer to create something side-effect wise. But it shows that true love can be like the lottery, to get through and not misunderstand each other and change in the process. At the same it isn’t that hard. It’s always easy actually which is also why it can be so hard.